


Up On Tiptoes

by hisboywriter



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Eventual Explicit Content, Get together fic, M/M, awkward teenagers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-26
Updated: 2015-10-10
Packaged: 2018-04-23 10:04:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 15,572
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4872673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hisboywriter/pseuds/hisboywriter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"It makes sense Kageyama would run into a door."<br/>~</p>
<p>AKA Murphy's Law takes no pity on Kageyama's what-are-these-feelings-dilemma about Hinata.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. When It Rains

**-X-**

It makes sense that Kageyama would walk straight into the door.

Just before the pain registers, his mind stupidly fixes, of all things, on the proverb he learned not days ago in his English class: when it rains it pours. Back in class Kageyama thought it made little sense (wasn’t it raining regardless?), but to be fair English continues to be on the lower end of his academic achievements, but at least ‘a bee to a crying face’ had more sense.

That is, until now where it took the last few weeks to this accumulated point of pain for the lesson to hit him. Literally.

Over the rush of Kageyama’s blood (or is it his humiliation?), Hinata’s laugh shines through. It’s strong and were Kageyama in less pain, he may feel that weird sensation he’s been getting in his stomach lately each time he hears that sound.

“Did you just--You did! You ran into the door! Like--bam! Who does that?” Hinata asks, suddenly vivid between the cracks of Kageyama’s finger from clutching his face. “Are you okay?” It’s asked between the laughing. Kageyama turns away completely.

Sheer will quiets the groan Kageyama can’t entirely keep down. “I can’t hear…”

“What? You can’t hear anything?”

“I...can’t hear where that annoying voice is coming from, being out of my periphery and all.” Even through pain, he’ll bark back at whatever stupid thing Hinata has to say. That’s one normalcy Kageyama tries to hold onto.

Hinata chokes on his laughter-turned-anger. As he should, as this is all his damn fault, even if the shrimp doesn’t know it, because he’d been tugging his shirt off and, being the level of stupidity Hinata is, got stuck for a moment. And if he hadn’t, maybe Kageyama wouldn’t have felt the pull to look at his shoulder blades, the way his waist tapered down to the edge of his shorts where a hint of his boxers peeked through.

Then the door came.

“Oh!”

Kageyama flinches, both at Hinata’s tone and the way he’s grabbed at by his shirt and Hinata’s face is so close he can feel the energy as a form of heat from the smaller player. It’s one of several observations that’s made Kageyama feel like his world is off balance. So much so that he ran straight into a door, apparently.

“Wh-What the hell are you staring at!”

Hinata blinks and tilts his head, eyes widening. “You’re bleeding!”

Kageyama touches his nose, sure enough, Hinata isn’t dumb enough to mistake the blood for something else.

Of course.

Not later enough, as Kageyama sits in the infirmary, tending his nose and glowering at Hinata to leave, he doesn’t know how any of this really happened. It feels like the lurking storm broadcasted on the news since the start of the week, promising to hit when it damn well pleases with total indifference to the plight it’s going to bring your way. That includes potentially canceling practice.

Kageyama thinks he’d prefer a bee to the face.

“Stop that,” Kageyama says.

Hinata tenses and frowns, hovering in the doorway, like he’d been hovering when Kageyama stalked to the infirmary with the intent of leaving his teammate behind.

“Stop what?”

“You’re trying not to laugh again.”

“I was not!” Hinata presses his lips firmly together, probably trying not to laugh just because Kageyama said he was doing just that. His bright eyes drop down and he fidgets. Kageyama can count how many times on one hand Hinata’s stayed still.

“...But are you okay? That looked, um, well,  _sounded_  like it hurt.”

If Kageyama had been knocked unconscious, at least he wouldn’t be having this conversation.

“I’m fine.” It’s not made better by the slight nasally sound to his voice.

“Are you sure? I mean, weren’t you looking--”

“Hinata.”

Hinata notices his side-glare. “Wh-What!”

“Shut up.”

Hinata bristles. “Fine. It’s not like I was worried about your or anything…”

Kageyama’s chest does a thing at the change in Hinata’s voice. He hates it, and more so how frequent it is.

_I must be getting sick._

Strange, when physically he feels in top shape, minus the flutters and woozy sensations that come and go, particularly around Hinata. Maybe it’s a different kind of sick. Most likely he’s overdosed on Hinata’s personality. That can be a thing, can’t it?

Kageyama realizes he’s closed his eyes, and opens them quick at feeling someone nearby. It’s Hinata, of course, having crept closer to witness more of his misery. Only his face looks a tad more concerned than amused.

“You know,” Hinata starts, pointing, “your face might get stuck in a scowl one day. My mom says it can happen.”

“Is that why your face looks like that?”

Hinata blanches, and he’s off again, stumbling over his insults from the sudden influx of anger that makes his cheeks go this kind of nice pink. In truth, Kageyama doesn’t dislike Hinata’s face at all. It's bright and fierce, meant to be a decoy.

Kageyama’s sitting there with a tissue to his nose and ointment rubbed into the sore spot on his forehead while Hinata’s ranting. He sighs and reaches out, without thinking at all, and pats Hinata on the head, awkwardly.

It shuts him up immediately.

And it should be left it that, but Kageyama’s fingers skim back, feeling his soft hair, and he’s horrified that either of his hands would ever betray him like that.

“There you two are.”

Sugawara is in the room the same second Kageyama jerks his hand back.

“Sugawara-san!” Hinata beams over at their senior, touch forgotten. “Kageyama ran into a door!”

Really, the unconscious thing. Way preferable.

Sugawara quirks a brow at him. “That sounds unpleasant. Here, let me see.”

Kageyama isn’t about to refuse him and endures the motherly treatment, but not without a few mumbles that he’s alright.

“Well,” Sugawara sighs, leaning back from his inspection. “it’s a good thing practice is done for the day. You’ll want to mind that. You might get a bump if you ran in hard enough to make your nosebleed.”

Kageyama tries to ignore the comment Hinata makes about how appropriate a pair of bumps (horns) would match his expression. He fails, but he blames that more on the phenomenon that makes everyone unable to ignore Hinata.

“I’ll do that,” Kageyama says, nodding to his senior. Both he and Hinata grab their bags and there’s the recent memory of Hinata looking like he had gone to reach for Kageyama’s bag back in the locker room to haul it on his behalf to the infirmary. In retrospect, he probably wasn’t, but Kageyama’s mind clearly didn't care.

Sugawara steps aside, expecting the two to accept his escort down the hall. “You think you’ll survive until training camp? It’s just a couple days away.”

Even if it’s in jest, Kageyama can’t help a serious response. “Yes. I was...clumsy.” The excuse sounds stupider said aloud.

“Distracted?” Sugawara asks, and his smile is that one Kageyama finds enigmatic.

“Maybe you were thinking too much about training week!” Hinata smiles over at Kageyama, eyes hopeful in a way that Kageyama knows that would be Hinata’s reason for running into things, which he hasn’t. “It’s going to be so great!”

Sugawara laughs. “You’re really pumped for it. That’s good. I am too.”

Kageyama is grateful they easily bypass his excuse for the door incident. He’s suddenly a little more occupied with the way Hinata gesticulates, punching the air and grinning as he shares his zeal with Sugawara.

“We studied hard with the others so we can go,” Hinata rambles on, and it pulls up memories for Kageyama that cozy up right beside the new ones of Hinata talking their ears off right now.

Maybe the studying contributes to his, well, whatever this is. His sleep has been a little off kilter, what with all the hours spent bent over notes. Sometimes it was Hinata’s notes, which were always a struggle to make sense of and often Kageyama had to lean over and point something out, and each time it seemed to give him the perfect whiff of Hinata and feel the soft graze of his arm against his own.

“...right, Kageyama?”

Kageyama blinks hard. Both Hinata and Sugawara are looking at him. Both make his stomach flip for very different reasons, and he has to look forward to avoid the way Sugawara was looking at him. It somehow reminds him of how his mom looked at him this morning after Kageyma said he’d slept fine, but hadn’t.

“Ah, yeah,” he says, non-committal, because he isn’t exactly sure what Hinata was talking about.

“Hm.” Sugawara’s hum is a little too amused. “It will certainly be fun, but don’t forget, it’s for training.”

“But we won’t train at night! There will be things we can do. You know, um, eating together and, hm, talking about things, and games, and--”

“There you are.” It’s one of the few voices that can make Hinata shut up.

Daichi smiles at them from where he waits beyond the exit with two gym bags, looking like the chill that’s settling in doesn’t bother him. Kageyama notices Hinata straightens a fraction at the sight of their captain, as if coming to attention. Kageyama probably does something similar.

“Ah, so you waited after all,” Sugawara says, reaching out to accept the bag Daichi held on his behalf. “Thank you.”

“You took longer than I expected.”

“Kageyama ran into a door,” Sugawara says. It’s officially the day’s national anthem.

Kageyama tenses the instant Daichi’s eyes fall on him. They rake over him in analysis, and he must be satisfied with the extent of Sugawara’s explanation because a beat later, he breaks into a smile that is somehow still all business.

“I’m sure you’ve already been told by Sugawara to be careful, but it bears repeating. Now’s not the time for clumsiness.”

Kageyama almost hears himself stuttering out a response. “Er...yes, captain.”

Daichi shakes his head. “Look sharp or else you won’t make it to camp, much less survive it.”

Kageyama isn't about to disagree.

There’s a brief relief in their parting ways, and also not at all when it’s Hinata that he’s paired off with on the return walk home. Sugawara and Daichi linger enough long enough for Hinata to grab his bike and share parting words, but it’s still not enough time for Kageyama to restructure himself back the way he was before he started running into doors.

His face still throbs, and Kageyama swears it’s in tune with the sound of Hinata’s bike rolling over reach crack in the pavement as he walks it alongside. By now the sun’s far into its descent, orange-ing the sliver of sky not mottled by the thick clouds, almost the same kind of orange of Hinata’s hair were it not for the gloom of coming rain.

“It’s too bad they don’t go the same way,” Hinata says, “we all could have gotten ice cream or something. The cold would be good for your face.” Of course Hinata would be more than fine having ice cream with a potential storm in their midst.

“You expect me to put ice cream on my face?”

Hinata blinks as his mind catches up and then there’s a little purse of his lips that shouldn’t validate the stupidity of his comment (it does). Kageyama forces his gaze ahead and instead thinks about how their walks home together has become the default way of traveling.

“Well, it’s cold anyways,” Hinata mumbles.

 _Idiot_ , is what Kageyama thinks, but it hardly sounds like an insult so he opts not to test it aloud. The part of him that isn’t concerned by that is fixated on how close Hinata walks beside him. Or is it the other way around? Had they always walked so close that, with the slightest bend of their elbows, they would be touching?

Kageyama shoves his hands deeper into the pockets of his jacket.

“Kageyama?”

“What.”

“Are you really okay?”

Kageyama sneaks a glance over and regrets witnessing the way Hinata’s looking at him. So damn open, his concern and something else (suspicion?) obvious enough that Kageyama wonders how anyone can survive looking so honest.

“Of course I am.” He makes sure it sounds hard.

Hinata opens his mouth at the same time a groan of thunder comes from the distance. They both peer back where the darkest of the clouds lurk.

“Oh, man,” Hinata stares up, “I hope practice won’t get cancelled tomorrow.”

“Better it hits now than while we’re away training,” Kageyama says, but he’s just as much up for braving a storm as Hinata looks like he is. And Kageyama is looking, but it still surprises him when Hinata suddenly exclaims and blindly seizes his arm.

“Look, lightning! Wow! Did you see that? It was a big one!”

Hinata’s hand drops as quickly as it had grabbed him. Its effects linger on Kageyama even through the layer of his jacket, and he makes himself look back at the clouds, but he’s already missed the lightning. Instead, he’d had the view of Hinata’s eyes blown wide, jaw falling open. How anyone can look so genuinely enraptured puzzles him.

A word that is not 'idiot' dares to tickle Kageyama’s throat. He blames it on the dull ache of his face that’s somehow spreading into his chest. His attention sweeps over Hinata with the same swift accuracy he exhibits during a game.

“Only you would want to stick around when lightning’s coming."

There’s a clap of thunder, louder, and Hinata definitely makes a little noise as he scurries back alongside Kageyama.

“We can always outrun it!”

“You can’t outrun--”

A rush of energy and Hinata’s already scampering off ahead with a laugh trailing behind him. He looks ridiculous with his bike in his hands, running as if the rain’s already on them. Kageyama doesn’t know who is more ridiculous because his gut already has him running to put him in the race.

When they reach Kageyama’s house, they’re breathless, and there’s not a drop of rain in sight yet.

“Not fair,” Hinata huffs, sagging against his bike. “You didn’t have a bike.”

Kageyama’s more than fine with still counting his victory.

“Dumbass, you’re the one who ran off.”

“At least I didn’t run into a door!”

Kageyama can’t stop the glare that makes Hinata tense up and try to scowl back at him. It pales in comparison. “I didn’t run into it! It got in my way! And I’m not the one who got stuck in my own shirt.”

There’s a tinge of pink that streaks across Hinata’s cheeks and nose. That little nose that is just a nose and nothing special so why is Kageyama noticing how it crinkles.

And then it hits him. His eyes have dropped to Hinata’s mouth, for just a second, and that second is all it takes, and there’s an image that’s never entered his mind before, vivid and loud as Hinata himself. Then suddenly it’s not just a fantasy, but an urge to kiss Hinata, and it’s absolutely terrifying and he’s sure that can’t be what just crossed his mind here, now, and with the idiot in front of him.

The realization is worse than any lightning strike.

“Kageyama!”

Kageyama blinks, and he’s propelled out of the fantasy, back to a reality that must be a dream. He blinks again and tenses at that intensity he finds Hinata ogling him with.

“What are you staring at?” It comes out less vicious than he likes.

“You weren’t listening.”

“I...was too.”

“Oh, yeah? What was I talking about?”

Kageyama snorts and looks away, and it’s certainly not because Hinata’s lips are pursing. “I don’t have to defend myself to the likes of you.”

“Hm…”

Kageyama can feel Hinata’s presence draw near. He whips his head back and glares Hinata a good foot away. Why hasn’t he just run inside his home?

“What now?” Kageyama asks.

“Are you sure you don’t have a concussion?”

“Of course I don’t.” Kageyama swallows and hardens his voice back up. “Stop saying stupid things.”

“I’m just making sure!” Hinata frowns, but Kageyama refuses to notice it directly. “It would be awful if you did and just before camp, you know.” Hinata’s voice, even in a pout, has the force to rattle what nerves Kageyama is grappling to hold onto.

What the hell was happening to him?

“Stop talking.” Kageyama has the foresight to gesture his head back toward the coming rain. “Unless you want to be drenched when you get home.” There’s an itch to keep walking, to make sure Hinata gets home fine. Kageyama has to force himself to stay put.

He doesn’t pay much attention to Hinata’s farewell, but he does linger enough until he can’t see the bright shock of hair being pedaled away. Then, he goes inside, greets his mom with his usual grace, and is sure to keep his head ducked as he passes by her location in the kitchen. One look at his face and he won’t be reaching the sanctity of his room for a while. He throws in an off-hand excuse about needing a shower before all her how-was’s can stop him in his tracks.

Tiny victories. Kageyama hates them.

When he shuts the door to his room, he sags against it and feels the tremor overcome him. Whatever mental effort he’d gathered to lift it all above him weakens. Without the buffer of keeping up face, everything crashes down. All the little things from the last few weeks that seemed independent (the number of puffy hair spikes Hinata has? Varies. Kageyama counted twenty-seven once, and twenty-two another) piece together, and at the center is that mental photograph of Hinata’s mouth and all the shapes it takes.

It’s an illness of the worst kind. Poison, and Kageyama thinks if he’d eaten recently he might just very well puke.

Absolutely no way, in any hell, heaven, or reincarnated life, does he like Hinata.

 

**-x-**

 

Kageyama likes Hinata.

Two days later, it’s the only conclusion left. It’s a conspiracy, really, because when the storm barreled down after Kageyama’s epiphany (like a bad omen), it wouldn’t let up. When Kageyama convinced himself that practice the next day would realign things the way playing volleyball seemed capable of doing, the thunder screamed down its protest. Daichi sent a mass message cancelling practice.

And when Kageyama, caged inside, convinced himself that the day after would be different, the rain pissed all over that hope even harder. That left him only with his thoughts and a mom who inquired too much without actually asking anything, which he eschewed by holing up in his room studying (but not really).

Instead of textbooks though, there were Hinata’s texts.

**this sux!! I would sneak**

**out but my mom would**

**kill me**

Hinata texting him wasn’t an anomaly, but now it feels like one. Kageyama replied as curtly as he could to some of the messages (complaints of the weather mostly), because not replying seemed worse. Why, he didn’t know.

Then, one particular text on the second day of Kageyama’s torture.

**Kenma says he might**

**visit after camp! I think he**

**wants to see if I get any**

**good!**   **I hope we can play**

**them again**

It’s a pang that pushes Kageyama’s heart all the way to his throat. It makes him loathe Kenma for reasons beyond his skill. It makes his face feel warm, and not in the way it does lately thinking of Hinata, which is a pastime he wishes he knew how to curb.

Jealousy. His mind picks out the word though he won’t admit it.

Why would he be jealous?

And Kageyama stupidly tried to answer that, which pushed him onto the most hazardous train of thinking. At one point he got up and broke out his volleyball, using it as a point of reference as he thought, tossing it up and down, up and down. He tangled himself up more than once, and then as the truth came into view, he deviated down all lines of thoughts possible. Each time, it redirected him back to the same thing.

He likes Hinata?

No, he doesn’t.

How could he?

Never.

Only one thing matters to him.

But Hinata’s part of that now?

He can’t like Hinata.

Maybe.

He couldn’t.

But.

Dangerous thinking.

What if he did?

It made for two aching temples that the thunder seemed all too delighted to aggravate. If nothing else, Kageyama knew he couldn’t function if he continued as he was, feeling like his thoughts were going to drown him the way the rain might.

Eventually, he stopped tossing and looked back out his window. The rain would quiet down tonight, leaving tomorrow fresh and ripe for the team to go off on their trip.

He likes Hinata.

He repeats the theory, again, and again.

So now, Kageyama thinks, and by no means all that willingly, by addressing that truth, it means a quicker resolution.

It doesn’t.

Kageyama exhales hard and bumps his forehead against the cold glass of his window. The incident with the door seems an eternity ago compared to his new plight. He’s left feeling as exhausted as when he prepared for exams. Though he’s been sleeping the same amount of time, the last two nights have been riddled with dreams of Hinata, so much so that Kageyama’s convinced it’s the equivalent of a ghost haunting him.

He likes Hinata.

He can’t fathom the why’s, how’s, or when’s. It makes him cringe trying to.

His phone buzzes. He can’t help reach for it off his bed and read Hinata’s text.

**Ahh news says the rain**

**will stop early 2night!! 2 days**

**is enough. Mom scolded**

**me for trying to practice**

**in the house**

Maybe Kageyama doesn’t like Hinata.

Another text:

**But Natsu’s**

**good at tossing! Maybe**

**better than u?**

Maybe. That word eases his strife. Barely, but it’s something.

**jk. No one tosses**

**better than u. Even**

**though Natsu is a close**

**2nd haha 2morrow is**

**the day!!**

Kageyama’s chest does that weird feeling again. It almost feels as calming as it leaves him agitated. It’s not fair that Hinata is living off in his stupidity with the normalcy Kageyama doesn’t have.

He texts back despite himself.

**Yeah. Don’t do anything**

**stupid before then.**

Hinata texts back with the speed that proves he’s bored out of his mind.

**Dummy I’m not the**

**one running into doors**

Then, another fast on its heels before Kageyama feels the flash of annoyance.

**I really can’t wait for**

**2morrow. SO MUCH**

**FUN!**

Kageyama wants tomorrow to hurry up too. Training may be the last attempt to remedy this sickness, to re-establish volleyball as the thing that eclipses all else, even Hinata’s shine.

Until then, it’s him, the rain, and Hinata’s texts that he can’t seem to ignore. Kageyama grunts and bumps his head against the window again, wincing. The stupid proverb mocks him all over again.

When it rains, it pours. Only every drop of the storm is Hinata, and Kageyama is absolutely and undeniably soaked.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first KageHina fic, and I hope you got some enjoyment out of it. I hope the first chapter wasn't too dull of a start.
> 
> I am going to satisfy all sorts of scenes I want to see KageHina in. I haven't decided on everything just yet.
> 
> And just a fun note if you didn't already know: 'a bee to a crying face' is a Japanese proverb. I thought it would be fun to title each chapter off a proverb to contrast it with Murphy's Law.
> 
> I am also on [Tumblr](http://hisboywriter.tumblr.com/)!
> 
> Thanks you for reading!


	2. The Earth Hardens

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Between him and Hinata, Kageyama is officially the bigger idiot.

**-x-**

Kageyama’s mom, like most, has super senses.

It's in the morning of training camp when, the moment after he’s swallowed the last bite of his breakfast, she asks, “Is everything alright?”

It’s one question, and like all her questions, it’s crafted with purpose, and capable of dismantling the foundation Kageyama worked very hard to build since dawn. Her tone is open and her gaze mom-like in that way that had always made a younger Kageyama feel as if she had the answers to the universe.

Not that he ever asks her for any of those anymore.

He must not be doing such a good job with that foundation building apparently either.

He’s suddenly aware he can’t avert his gaze and look down. He has to look at her like everything is as it should be, even though he knows that she suspects because moms don’t ask that kind of thing for no reason. At least not his.

Even if Kageyama can guess it’s a mom thing, it’s still unfair and not any less of a super sense. Or superpower.

 _Is everything alright_. It’s a gateway question to a flood of others that pop up in Kageyama’s mind.

 _Are you making friends with the new team_ (sort of debatable)? _Are you making sure to stay hydrated and nutritioned during practice_ (yes)? _Did you dream of kissing Hinata_ (yes)? _Did you have to take a cold shower this morning_ (yes)? _Did you think of ways to lie to your mom to keep her radar off this_ (no, but he should have)?

He’s grateful he’s already eaten or he would have lost his appetite then. He almost wonders if her timing is just as purposeful.

“Why wouldn’t it be?” he asks. He gets up, using the excuse of putting his dishes away as a means to break eye contact.

“Hm.” It’s a happy, calm sounding hum. Kageyama equates it to her contemplating noise, so he hurries up. She doesn’t crowd him, never does, and when he grabs his bag, he knows he has to face her again.

She smiles and can’t help touch flick off dust that doesn’t exist on his jacket. “You’re getting taller than me. Soon you’ll be twice my height.”

“I won’t be that tall.”

“You’ll be responsible for reaching the areas I can't dust.”

“I already dust them.”

“Then I better hope not much builds up while you’re away. Are you nervous?”

“I’m fine.”

Kageyama doesn’t know how their conversation always flows in a way it can’t with anyone else. She always navigates a conversation around him and allows for such fluidity, but that might also be a mom thing. That doesn’t mean her question has been answered. She’s still asking things even when she’s not.

“It’s only a week,” he says, grabbing his bag. Then, before she can do a little fussing like she did upon finding the bump on his head, “I’ll be okay.”

“I know,” she says, and he swears she doesn’t sound so confident. “You’ll have fun? That one boy will be there too, right? The one you said jumps high. Hm...Hinata, was it?”

Kageyama hates himself for ever sharing that name with his mom, but in his defense it had been in a moment of frustration months ago. She’d got him at a good moment when his defense was down and she’d been serving curry for dinner.

“He’s on the team.” 

She nods. Kageyama doesn’t understand the gesture, but it seems there’s a lot he didn’t understand until recently. His head is beginning to feel heavy already.

She sighs and runs off a few more things for him to keep in mind as he slips into his shoes. When he opens the door he welcomes the bite of the stubborn cold and looks up at the rainless sky, clean of any clouds.

“And remember,” his calls out to him from the doorway, “to have a good time, Tobio.”

Kageyama almost flinches.

Somehow it feels like it’s the last thing he’ll have.

**-x-**

He won’t tell Hinata anything.

It’s a resolve he's set on since the night before, after hours of deliberation before he could attempt sleep. The decision keeps him afloat as he faces his team at the meet-up spot. Through a round of morning greetings, Kageyama's sure they will smell the truth off him, or see it like a thick layer of ooze all over him, and that will be how his world ends.

No one does though. Even Tsukishima’s snub is its usual level of assholeness.

It’s hardly a relief.

It’ll pass, is what Kageyama’s convinced himself of. An infection passes with proper treatment. This training is all the medicine he needs, particularly after being holed up for two days due to a force beyond his skill. The concept of involving anyone on his problem is enough to churn his stomach.

“Good morning,” Sugawara says when he approaches. “Did Hinata message you?”

Kageyama feels a chill dive up his spine. Hinata messages him frequently by now. Another anomaly he doesn't remember happening. “Ah...no. Why?”

“Oh,” Sugawara shrugs, “Daichi just got a message from Hinata. He's running late.”

“How late?”

Sugawara laughs. “I’m sure he’s running this way so hopefully not very.”

“We’ll load up the bags meanwhile,” Daichi says, “and then lineup for roll call.”

While Kiyoko tallies off their names, Kageyama sneaks a handful of peeks at her. He isn't oblivious. He recognizes her beauty, sure, even feels a hint of intimidation by it whenever she’d address him, but that’s the extent of it. He tries to instill whatever it is that Tanaka gets when he sees her.

Nothing.

As names are checked off, they load the bus one at a time, with no sign of Hinata just yet. Kageyama takes a window seat somewhere in the middle of the bus instead of craning his neck to spot Hinata first. No one takes the spot next to him, even so much as looks at it. He tries to ignore Tanaka behind him being too loud about his intentions of sitting beside their manager, and the general conversations picking up as they settle in.

There’s only one person Kageyama simultaneously doesn’t and does want to sit next to.

He takes a deep breath.

_Everything’s going to be fine. It’ll pass._

Then:

“I’M SO SORRY!”

Kageyama peers out the window in time to see part of Hinata’s head bowing repeatedly in time with his each of his apologies. The post-rain atmosphere makes for a sky that has now become less dazzling thanks to Hinata’s presence. Kageyama blames the still-bright light for making the shrimp’s hair have a kind of glow to it.

 _Stop thinking stupid crap_. It’s a warning to himself just as Hinata mounts the steps into the bus. Seeing him already starts up the fuzziness in Kageyama's stomach, and makes the day better and worse at the same time.

At the mouth of the aisle, Hinata clings to his bag strap, all eyes on him. He bows his head and apologizes again.

“You better have been late because you were throwing up already,” Tsukishima says.

Hinata’s head whips up in irritation. It looks like even that action is too much for him and he has to steady himself.

Nishinoya beckons from his spot beside Tanaka (operation Sit-Next-to-Kiyoko seems to have failed). “You look like you’re going to faint, Shoyou!” Their libero pats the back of the seat next to Kageyama with good intentions, and it’s all Hinata needs to deflate there with a groan.

“Oh, man…” Hinata sounds like he’s stuck between a rasp and a whine. His face is still pink from embarrassment and exertion. Kageyama thinks about telling him to sit somewhere else, or mention the pinkness of his face.

He's saved by Daichi’s voice cutting through any and all further comments on Hinata’s inevitable tardiness. Everyone shuts up as he details the expectations of the ride over, really just a slew of do-nots, some aimed at particular team members given the way he emphasizes them.

Kageyama listens, but half of his attention is on the body next to him, the bane of the last two days and the wrench in his cogs since whenever it was exactly Hinata became a wrench. If he excelled in any of his mathematics, he bet he could pinpoint the distance between them down to the millimeter with one look.

Glancing over at Hinata, he notices the rings under his eyes, the way his body almost vibrates, the deep breaths he’s sucking in. Hinata is the only one who can embody the amalgamation of exhaustion and zeal so well and still not look completely awful.

Then again, Kageyama seems to have that damn bias working against him.

It makes him want to shift away, but he keeps still.  He waits until Daichi is done, and the bus rolls them away from the curb, allowing for conversations to pick up amidst the drone of the vehicle.

“You look half dead,” Kageyama says. 

Hinata blinks rapidly, looking like he’s trying to prove otherwise. He fails with a sigh and sags more with a moan.

“I was so excited and nervous,” Hinata says, with less oomph than is typical. His eyes begin to droop. Before Kageyama registers it properly, Hinata’s tilting precariously toward his space.

“Hey.” He nudges Hinata, who whines in response. “You better not throw up!”

The touch backfires. Hinata wilts his direction entirely and it’s all his scent on Kageyama and his head a sensation against Kageyama’s shoulder he’ll never forget.

“So...tired,” Hinata mumbles. “Just lemme...five minutes...and...”

Kageyama hisses and prods Hinata again, earning himself a noncoherent whisper that proves the shrimp’s lost to another world. No doubt the lull of the bus is just one more schemer in the mix.

“Haa, what’s this?” Nishinoya is peeking over the seat, grinning. “Aww. He already fell asleep. See? I told you he wouldn’t sleep last night. He’s so pooped even this guy makes for a decent pillow.”

Tanaka snorts, but also has decided to look over at the scene. Kageyama wouldn’t mind dropping dead. But then he reminds himself they can't possibly know about what he really feels about Hinata leaning against him. How he doesn't exactly hate it.

“Watch for the puke,” Tanaka warns, with an all too familiar menace to his smile.

“Tanaka, sit down properly!” It comes from the very front, but Daichi’s voice carries for good reason. Kageyama thinks he hears Sugawara snickering.

Kageyama knows a few, hard jerks of his shoulder and elbow will free him. Something stronger than that knowledge keeps him from doing it. In combination with the freshly soaped smell of Hinata, there's the quiet rhythm of his breath, and his warmth, all of which do nothing to help matters.

 _It’ll pass. I_ _t’ll pass..._

It’s the longest bus ride Kageyama’s ever had.

Not soon enough they arrive, but they do.The jar of the bus stopping hurtles Hinata awake, and he’s the first one bounding off like he had slept all night just fine, and hadn’t dozed off on Kageyama. It’s a level of ignorance Kageyama thinks he’s starting to envy.

Kageyama blinks after him, left in the wake of Hinata’s rush of wakefulness. "Hey, idiot! Don't just take off like that!"

Standing in the aisle, Tsukishima loiters by Kageyama’s seat long enough to say, “Looks like Hinata’s getting more comfortable invading your personal space. How quaint.”

A well sharpened glare is all Kageyama wastes on him before he gets up. Sugawara is the one counting them off, and he smiles that little smile when Kageyama is last off the bus.

“No drool,” Sugawara says. “Or vomit.”

Kageyama didn’t even think about that. He pats and examines himself to confirm his clothing is drool-free. His left shoulder still feels warm though. He thinks if he sniffed his clothing he might even detect a trace of Hinata.

Sugawara chuckles. “It’s nice to see how far you’ve two come.”

Kageyama has no proper response to that, nor even a workable protest. Instead he coughs over anything resembling a word, which earns him a gentler smile and Sugawara’s companionship as they step away from the bus.

“It’s good. You with the team. When you told me about trusting your team, I wasn’t sure you’d really try as hard as you have.”

“I...yeah.” Not the most intelligent response.

It’s only now Kageyama realizes he spent no time taking in the scenery during the bus ride up here, because his attention was on something (someone) else. He stops beside Sugawara as their lodging meets them with all the humility a place up in the mountains should have. By now the sky's less bright, the afternoon sun just about sitting on the top of the visible mountain range. Apparently there's a small town nearby, but again, Kageyama had been distracted.

Hinata’s voice could probably reach the town. “This place is so cool! The air is so great up here!”

Fresh air never really does anything magical for Kageyama, though he notices a crisper tinge to it here. He doesn’t think there’s enough of this kind of air to clear the mess of his head.

Something about Sugawara’s presence next to him rattles him, so he drifts forward after their captain and up into the building that's their home for the next week.

It’s a spacious place they rented, tucked into the wilderness, hugged by tall trees, and just as cozy inside. Kageyama’s more interested in the area they can’t see, where they’ll train. Hours upon hours of training is something he feels parched for about now.

Hinata, of course, finds even the barest decor of the interior fascinating and can't shut up about it.

_Not cute, not cute._

They get the tour first as their bags are unloaded into the living area, not that it’s much to look at. Kageyama thinks it’ll do nicely, but fails to see what has Hinata with a perpetually unhinged jaw. Not that he's staring more than usual or...anything.

There’s two washrooms, and one hallway devoted to a few rooms. Outside, however, is where a slice of heaven has been carved. Nets have been stationed and the groundwork has already been prepped for them, already hardened after the rain.

“We should be fine to practice out here, and there’s a trail leading back we’ll use as well.” Daichi gestures. “The ground's been checked and fine for warming up and practicing for a shorter amount of time than we usually do. Tomorrow is when your training officially begins, so enjoy today.”

Then, he rounds them up to settle on the benches fixed outside the building, facing the nets. Kageyama takes a spot at the edge. Hinata plops down beside him.

“Now,” Daichi begins again, “Ground rules.” He narrows his eyes before anyone can think of moaning about it. “Takeda-san also has words on behalf of our coach as well since he’s unable to make it. Listen up good.”

It’s stuff you’d expect. Kageyama listens with the same intensity as he reaches out mentally and feels Hinata so close to him. It’s a good thing he has the discipline to remain still or else he may be too aware of his own body and wonder if he was giving off signs about his Hinata-problem.

It ends up being a great task just sitting beside him though. Though Kageyama may be less focused on his own movements, he’s engrossed in Hinata’s. The damn idiot can’t sit still. Where Kageyama can mimic a gargoyle, Hinata is all animation, from his pent up eagerness to the way he tilts his head or leans his body that way or this as he absorbs Daichi’s words. It’s like physical movement enhances his listening skills or something.

Why do they always sit next to each other anyway?

Stupid question.

By the time Daichi's done, he's as eager as Hinata to find their bags and hurry back outside. They make it at the same time. Another tie.

“We’re finally here,” Hinata tells him, hopping up now that his gear is on. Kageyama noticed a patch of his inner thigh when he’d been putting it on. “After two days of nothing, this is going to be so great! I thought I was going to die!”

Kageyama shares that sentiment.

“You better have not gotten sloppy in those two days.”

“What! Of course not. I practiced as much as I could, you know!”

Kageyama steps away from him before Hinata can get up in his face even more. Then, he’s stepping onto one of the courts, and it’s like he’s on holy ground. There’s a ball in Hinata’s hands, and when it comes to him, the warm up begins effortlessly.

It’s just what Kageyama needs.

Concentration finds him. Stretches are done and light practice picks up with the fluidity that’s become the norm for Karasuno. This much Daichi allows, but tomorrow has been dictated to be the official start of what Tanaka says will be hell-week. Kageyama's pretty sure he's halfway there already.

For now, this suffices. There’s no urge to look at the way Hinata’s shirt rises or memorize the facets of determination that cross his face. There's just volleyball.

It’s as close to bliss as Kageyama can get, and he begins to believe everything’s back to normal.

“Nice, Yamaguchi! Kageyama! Set up!”

“Right!”

The ball comes wide.

Kageyama dashes.

“Wait-Kageyama, look out!”

Slips.

Hinata’s warning echoes with the same shrill of an alarm as Kageyama stumbles. Time grinds down to the agonizing point of his struggle, to that moment where he sees Hinata’s hair in his periphery and then it’s all Hinata, his scent once again, the full feel of his body.

Crashes.

Kageyama comes to himself in a vicious heartbeat. He’s piled right on top of Hinata, and even if he’s shoved himself up, he’s already imprinted the feel of Hinata’s chest against his own, the feel of his neck against Kageyma’s cheek, the sinful pressure of his hips into Kageyama’s stomach-- _Oh, shit._

It’s worse than a nightmare.

The world is drowned out by the roar of adrenaline. Beneath him, Hinata’s groaning and opening those wide eyes. The image is seared into the darkest depths of Kageyama’s psyche, a brand he knows will be the last thing he sees each time he blinks.

Kageyama feels fire scorching through his veins. His mouth falls open.

“IDIOT!”

“What?! You’re the one who crashed into me!”

“Because of you!”

“Me?!”

“What are you doing shouting like that!”

“I thought the ground was wet! I thought you were going to sprain your ankle or something!”

“Dumbass! They already checked the area! We wouldn’t be playing on it if they didn’t think it was safe!”

“It _looked_ wet!”

Kageyama doesn’t remember when they seized each other’s shirts, but he’s never been so torn between shaking the stupidity out of Hinata and drawing him just a little closer. But whether to kiss him or strangle him is up for debate.

Daichi’s intervention is required, and Kageyama feels no less better facing the team, trying desperately to ignore the teasing faces and jeers at a blunder no one expected the King himself to be a part of.

And it’s not even day one of camp.

How could this have happened?

It’s proven the dark patch Kageyama nearly stepped on is, in fact, not damp. It earns Hinata a glare that’s interrupted by Sugawara.

“Now, now, shake it off, you two.” He waves like that’s all it takes for Kageyama to forget the incident. He can’t. His stomach is a pit of vipers and he feels like his body is melting from the inside out.

He exhales hard and looks away. It’s all he can do.

_Shake it off._

He can manage that. He convinces himself he can.

_Shake. It. Off._

Into the fourth practice round, with the pressure of Hinata's body against his still fresh, Kageyama knows he can't.

On a break, and far from Hinata, Kageyama ducks his head under a faucet and pretends he can drown from it.

"Kageyama!"

The gush of water does nothing to cotton the power of Hinata's voice. Kageyama feels himself go tense down to his legs as he straightens and buys time by burying his face in a towel. Each step of Hinata's shoes feels like a nail going into his coffin.

"Kageyama!" Hinata's right next to him now, and since Kageyama can't stay buried in the towel, looks at him. At that, Hinata tenses and hesitates, as if remembering Kageyama had just about strangled him not long ago. "Um, well, Takeda-san says we're getting a big dinner tonight! Isn't that awesome?"

Kageyama doesn't know why Hinata has this compulsion to restate facts like they're fascinating and worth sharing with Kageyama. 

But a big dinner sounds good. Even if he feels a little stripped of his appetite, a good meal might help.

"It's only big if you don't eat everything first," Kageyama says, so easily he can pretend he doesn't like the way Hinata's face scrunches up in a pout.

"I won't! You eat a lot too, you know."

"You eat the most."

Hinata narrows his eyes in a way Kageyama doesn't see often. It's more a scrutinizing look than anything, and Hinata's closed the gap a little. Kageyama hates himself for taking a step back, then stops himself before his other foot can match the other.

"What the hell are you looking at now? My nose isn't bleeding."

"Hm." Hinata leans back, tilting his head. "Are you still mad at me?"

"What?"

"You...You want to go or something?"

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

"What's wrong with _you_?  _You're_ being weird."

" _You're_ weird." Kageyama, aware how lame that response is, doesn't care enough to feel embarrassed about it.

"I mean it! I don't know. It's like...a different feeling around you?" Hinata tries to translate by waving his arms and hands. That, added with nonsensical onomatopoeia, makes Kageyama want to pin him back down on the ground.

"I'm fine," Kageyama says over Hinata's attempts to explain. "Just...a little tired."

"Ohh." Hinata hops onto a bench nearby, grabbing for a drink in his bag. "You didn't sleep much either?"

"I slept some. You didn't sleep at all," Kageyama says. _You fell asleep on me because of that._

"Yeah, well, I've never been away like this!" Hinata's legs swing even as he takes a long gulp of water. "I had to recount how much underwear I needed, and--"

Kageyama does not want to think about Hinata's underwear.

"It's not a big deal," Kageyama says, because he's clearly caught a little stupid by not ending this conversation. Instead, he goes for his own bag, fishing out his bottle.

"It is too! Even you have to be a little excited?"

"What do you mean, even me?"

"You like being with the team."

Kageyama stops rummaging. He looks up at Hinata, looking at him so damn openly, like nothing Kageyama can say will retract his statement.

Hinata takes his moment a silence to elaborate. "I told you I don't care about what happened before in middle school about the King stuff, but you have a new team now, and me to hit your tosses."

It's not exactly a clear explanation, but then it wouldn't be a Hinata explanation otherwise. Still, Kageyama never really thought of applying the term 'like' to his new team. It's not that it isn't true. Rather, he does enjoy the nuisances Karasuno provides and, well, he can't deny that their elders haven't welcomed him and worked with him despite his own hiccups. Even Tsukishima offers something to the dynamic and skill of their team, jerk or not.

Kageyama finds himself rather being at the gym with them than anywhere else.

But it's Hinata who comes to the conclusion more than himself.

"...I never said I didn't," Kageyama mutters, taking another, longer drink of water.

Hinata makes a happy kind of sound. "I like being part of the team too."

"Hey, Hinata!" Sugawara waves from several yards away. "Ready to try the receiving bit again?"

Hinata grins up at Kageyama before abandoning everything. By now the team's scattered off into groups, some practicing, others already winding down with stretches. Then there's the captain, who smiles as Hinata bounds by, and then is coming right where Kageyama is.

Uh-oh.

“Kageyama.”

Kageyama straightens at the captain' voice. He's smiling at Kageyama too, but there's something different about his smile than the one he'd given Hinata.Then again, people’s expressions have eluded Kageyama for most of his life. He wonders if his outburst with Hinata has earned him a scolding.

Daichi settles in the spot next to where Hinata had been sitting, grabbing his own water bottle.

After a drink, he says, "It's a nice place."

Kageyama nods, stiff. It seems rude to stand taller than his senior, so he lowers down next to Daichi, in the spot Hinata had used. Just sitting like this, Kageyama thinks it’s nice. The place must be usually peaceful were it not for a swarm of teenagers smacking balls around. Then there's the unique ruckus Tanaka and Hinata are capable of creating together.

"What’s troubling you?”

The question startles Kageyama from his staring, which incidentally means he was looking at Hinata. He looks over at Daichi, feeling terrified that something must be giving him away. First Hinata, and now the captain. 

_You're overreacting. Calm down._

“I don’t…I mean, there’s nothing troubling me.”

“You’re certain?”

Kageyama starts to nod a fraction of a moment too late.

“You’re not so certain.”

Kageyama doesn't nod. 

Daichi smiles though, and it’s strangely softening on his features. “I know I can be quite strict about things. A captain makes you a lot of things.”

Kageyama nods slowly, pretending he understands.

“It also means I notice things.”

“If it’s about yelling at Hinata--”

“Kageyama.”

He shuts up with any excuse.

“I have to do what’s good for the team, but that doesn’t mean I don’t care about each of you as individuals.” Daichi pauses. The words feel palpable, floating around Kageyama, though not settling on him.

He blinks back, unsure.

After a moment, Daichi exhales and shakes his head.

“Kageyama,” he says, “is volleyball a solo sport?”

“No.” Junior year rears to the forefront of Kageyama’s mind. It’s Hinata’s voice that eclipses it though: _I don’t care about any of that._

“Correct. We’re a team in many ways.”

Kageyama thinks if he nods again, it will give away how little he understands what Daich means. His hearing picks out Hinata’s laughter, and there’s the urge to sneak a glance over. He resists and tries to convince himself the sound is braying and annoying.

Daichi narrows an eye at him, then rubs the back of his neck with a sigh. Kageyama swears he hears him mutter something about Sugawara being better at this, but given his current state of mind he doesn’t count on that.

“I’m saying,” Daichi adds, “that sometimes there are things you work out with the help of another.”

Kageyama stares at him. “Ah…”

“That’s part of what being a captain is too,” Daichi says, this time with a kinder smile that soothes a thin layer of Kageyama’s tension.

It’s short lived as Kageyama realizes he’s doing a miserable job of figuring things out on his own and feels that much more miserable just thinking about bringing it up to anyone, least of all their captain who is as terrifying as he is respected.

The conversation, one-sided as it is, is dwindling to a silence Kageyama hopes isn’t awkward. Maybe if he was a different kind of person, if words were less a nuisance and his social skills not held up by a crutch, things would be easier. There’s a lump in his throat that wants to push something out though. 

"Whenever you need it," Daichi says with some finality, and stands.

Desperation pushes Kageyama to his feet as well. He makes a stupid noise that isn’t a word, but it earns him Daichi’s attention.

“How,” Kageyama pauses because he’s not about to sound like a stuttering idiot, and maybe his eyes dart around to see Hinata poised to receive, “...how would...that is," hell, it's not coming out, "about the, ah, " won't come out, "I mean. I'll...keep that in mind."

Daichi looks like he seems surprised and pleased at once. Before he starts to say something, Tanaka cackles in the distance, and their chat is over.

As the captain leaves, Kageyama's chest feels just a little less heavy.

**-x-**

Kageyama is sure he's on the verge of suffocation.

Stupid really, since it's been a while since the feeling started and he's not yet dead so chances are he's doomed to suffer in limbo for a while. Plus, to anyone else, there's plenty of space between his body and Hinata's, though their sleeping mats are touching. He feels every shift Hinata makes at the point of their joining, like it's an extension of his own body.

He stares at the ceiling with wide eyes, replaying how things came to this.

There was dinner, which was hearty and delicious enough that Kageyama did in fact feel a little more like himself. Hinata's moaning over mouthfuls didn't curb Kageyama's appetite as much as he expected either, or the fact that they, like clockwork, ended up sitting beside each other. (Who was the bigger idiot: the idiot or the idiot who sits by the idiot?)

Kageyama might have also made a point not to look at Daichi if he could help it. He equally hoped Daichi adopted the same sentiment about him, but he doubted it.

Then, bellies full and warm, came the rooming arrangements.

Kiyoko earned a room all to herself (made sense), leaving the fate of the others in straws . In retrospect, not the best method of selection, hence the current predicament, which is already one more too many than Kageyama thinks he can handle.

Kageyama still remembers the anxiety of drawing his straw, mind blank as he waited to see if it matched Hinata's red tipped one.

He'd pulled blue.

Tsukishima's straw had the blue tip.

Stuck in a room together, neither he nor Tsukishima got any sleep and instead waited to see who could glare and/or scoff the other to unconsciousness. Sometime an hour later, the moment Kageyama had started to convince himself his curse in roommate could be worse, some higher power remembered it didn't want things to go smoothly for him. But again, the retrospect thing: Tanaka and Hinata as roommates should have been averted, more so when Nishinoya joined in on their antics from the room next door, which happened to be beside Daichi and Sugawara's, and, well, another arrangement (argument) later, some choice words--

Here they are.

"Daichi-san sure got mad," Hinata mumbles, among a slew of other crap he's been saying.

Kageyama wonders when he has blinked last. His eyes hurt. His body tingles and he's sure it's because it's remembering what it felt like to be on top of Hinata.

"Are you asleep?" Hinata asks as he's propping up on his elbow to see that Kageyama is not in fact sleeping.

"Yes," Kageyama says, blinking once. He can't ignore Hinata's grin in the corner of his vision.

"Tanaka-san was saying it's funny how Daichi-san and Sugawara-san always end up in a room together. But I mean, they're third years and should be able to pick? Anyway, he said that," _oh my god he's not shutting up_ , "...too! I'm excited for tomorrow. I'm going to hit everything that comes my way during training!" He winces, catching the strength of his voice, and lowers it. "Hey, isn't this our first time sharing a room? And you're not yelling at me, y-"

"Because I'm _sleeping_ , dumbass."

"Guh? That makes no sense. Then how are you talking? And your eyes are open."

"I sleep with my eyes open."

Hinata actually looks like he might believe that. This is the same boy who thought he could outrun mother nature. It makes no sense it's this composition of stupidity and energy that makes Kageyama want to do more than yell at him.

God, he needed help.

"But what about the talking? I mean, you could be sleep walking, but then where's the walking part?"

"Shut. Up." Kageyama forces himself to roll away onto his side, as he should have done before. Just as he should have dragged his mat to the corner when Hinata settled up beside him like he figures it's natural to cuddle up next to someone when sharing a room. Probably thinks it's best for heat retention or something equally dumb. "Go to sleep."

Hinata makes an annoyed sound, followed by the noise of him winding back down into his blanket. He hasn't seemed at all perturbed that Kageyama became his new roommate, though he had been occupied recovering from Daichi's scolding. Kageyama knows asking for another switch will exasperate things so maybe he should prepare himself for not sleeping the entire week.

Kageyama doesn't want to think about that right now.

His mind makes it easy; it's tuned in to the slightest shift Hinata makes, the sound of his breath that has yet to even out. It's only minutes of this, but it easily can be hours. Kageyama wonders if this is how his life will be from now on, dragged out by the smallest intake of breath Hinata makes.

"Kageyama?"

 _Don't respond_.

"...What?" He matches Hinata's whispering.

"...Do you think this place is haunted?"

Kageyama can't believe what he's hearing. His body physically reacts and turns around, up on one arm to stare down at Hinata. He wants to be angry, and it's proving hard when it's just Hinata's face peeking out from the blanket.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"It's just," Hinata's eyes flick from one corner of the room, to the drapes on the window, to another corner, "Tanaka-san said he heard a story...about a girl here--"

"Is that why you were screaming?"

"I was not screaming!"

Kageyama sighs. "He was joking. This place isn't haunted."

"You sure?"

"Why would they send us here to train if they thought it was haunted?"

"...I guess."

"Hey." 

"Wh-What?"

"Look at me."

"..."

"Do I bother lying to your face?"

"...You did say I suck. And that I was lousy. And-"

"Because it was the truth."

Hinata slips out of his blanket, blinking up at him. Then, in a sudden motion to quick for Kageyama to process, he's thrust his face forward, inches away from their noses bumping. 

"Was?" Hinata says. His fear is waning with each stretch of his smile. Kageyama catches on too late to shut it down. "You said 'was'! That means you don't think I'm lousy anymore!"

"Th...That's not what I said!"

"But it's true!" Hinata closes in.

Kageyama flinches back. "It's...You're not as lousy as before."

Hinata is all but preening now. Finally he peels back and fists his hands that same way when they land one of their quick-strikes. "I must be really be getting awesome if you think that!" Even if he's whispering, his joy shines through easily.

Kageyama opens his mouth. Nothing comes out. He snaps it shut, caught on the reality that Hinata looks so pumped over something he sort-of said. Kageyama isn't sure what to do, and no insult finds him as he watches Hinata bask in this revelation. It's addicting, with Hinata's face being so, you know.

Hinata thumps onto his back again, one arm reaching toward the ceiling, palm exposed. "You know, I would have hated to admit this before, but you were right, about being invincible. Only I think it's more than that. Like," he clenches his hand once, "that -whoosh!- when I dodge and that feeling -bam!-when I hit your tosses." Hinata looks too delighted to feel a hint of their past grievances. Kageyama's starting to feel the same about now.

Then, Hinata sighs, content, and lowers his hand. "You make me better."

Kageyama feels something uncomfortable (regret?) for not grabbing that hand while it was still up. It's too late now, Hinata flashing him a smile before rolling onto his side, fluffing his pillow before it's just the shock of his stupid hair on display.

"I'm going to be unstoppable tomorrow! I'm going to go straight to sleep so training comes earlier. Good night!"

There's a challenge there, which is probably the only reason Kageyama settles back down too. But he already knows he's going to lose, his heart thumping faster, his face feeling a little flushed. He grabs a fistful of his own shirt, clutching tight like that might calm his heart. It doesn't, not with Hinata's smile that  _you make me better._

The sickness has gone deep where it can't be purged because Kageyama almost doesn't want the feeling in his chest, his stomach, and everywhere else Hinata's managed to squirm his way into, to go away. He wants to be able to takes Hinata's hand. Not that he knows what he'll do with it, like, it's kind of silly to just hold hands and when do you let go exactly or what if they don't fit right? 

There's other things too. All these wants flooding him after days' worth of dodging them (maybe if he had Hinata's speed he'd have escaped them). He wants to be able to scoot a little closer so he can better listen to Hinata's breathing, or feel the range of his body heat, let Hinata use his shoulder again and make it feel hot. Not that he needs the comfort, and he can pretend it might make Hinata feel at ease whenever he thinks a spirit might be lurking in the shadows.

He wants to let Hinata steal big portions of his lunch because he'd have bigger ones to start just for that reason. He wants to take him to see whatever stupid hero movie Hinata's been wanting to see, even though movie tickets are expensive. He wants to spend hours tossing to Hinata and then collapse together on the gym from exhaustion.

He wants to feel Hinata's body against him again.

He wants, and wants, and wants.

But more than any of those, Kageyama most wants to be the one to make Hinata smile that way again.

Just this morning his mom had asked if everything was alright. Now, Kageyama thinks he has the proper answer to that.

 _No, I_ _am terminally ill. I've caught something worse than Hinata's stupidity because I think I want to tell_ _him_.

After all three days' work to keep him from doing just that.

 _Shit_.

Between him and Hinata, Kageyama is officially the bigger idiot. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kageyama has accepted his condition completely! I really like putting him in awkward situations so you can anticipate more of that as he decides how to tell-but-not-tell Hinata. I apologize if you found any parts of this dull, but I wanted to set a foundation for later things.
> 
> Also as keen as Suga is (and he is in this fic too), I think Daichi has his own way of sensing disturbances among his little birds and think he'd be a great person to interact with Kageyama. Yeah??
> 
> I also think Kageyama would have a pretty great mom.
> 
> MOSTLY THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE FEEDBACK ALREADY! I can't say thanks enough and how much it means to me. I want to collect it all and shelve them in cute jars.
> 
> Thank you so, so much for reading!


	3. Even Monkeys Fall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hinata's a cuddler.

Hinata’s a cuddler.

It’s a fact. A reality Kageyama has no power over. Like, how the sky is blue or why the sun sets.

It’s not even a surprising fact, like when Kageyama learned about ice therapy for athletes; it makes sense after it’s explained and you wonder why you didn’t know about it before, and then it’s just another truth of the world added amongst the rest of your knowledge.

So it should be obvious Hinata is a cuddler. Someone that friendly (though really Hinata is too friendly with that Kenma kid) and animated would be the type to stupidly reach out, even in deep sleep, and paw and cling at the nearest thing because said stupidity extends deep into his subconscious.

When that thing happens to be Kageyama, however, it devalues his attempts to treat the cuddling as a mere fact, as something beyond his control, and therefore not worth dreading about.

Kageyama dreads plenty.

He also doesn’t sleep.

He should be thrilled, shouldn’t he? Being this close to the person you liked (ugh) isn’t a convenience for everyone, after all. How many would sacrifice to be in his kind of position? He tries to repeatedly ask himself that question, and gets a little more nauseous each time.

He’s not sure how long he’s stared up at the ceiling, eyes bulging and feeling dry. The bulk of his right side is owned by Hinata, the idiot’s head nestled against his shoulder so now both his shoulders have had the experience of Hinata on them, and Kageyama shouldn’t care, but he knows it’s too late.

If he wasn’t so petrified, he’s sure he’d be hard.

And Hinata can’t stop _moving_. A little shift here, a deeper breath there, a wiggle--Kageyama thinks he might pass out given how many times he’s held his own breath when Hinata moved.

Why didn’t he know this fact sooner? Suddenly he can’t recall that one time they all shared a room and if Hinata ended up snuggled up next to someone (Kageyama’s stomach tightens at the thought) or had been squished enough with all of them lined up like sardines that he’d been content.

These are the concerns and thoughts brought upon no sleep. Very, very, dumb ones.

Kageyama has to get out.

It takes a hell a lot of will for him to 1) force himself away from the touch that’s all too tempting, and 2) creep his way around and to the door without a peep. But then Kageyama stops, looks over, and sneaks back to fluff his side of the mat so Hinata has something else to grab, and then he’s high-tailing it out of there as much as you can in the dead of the night.

Which he then finds out is not so much night, but the new day rolling in. Kageyama can’t feel the lack of sleep just yet, even as he widens the distance between himself and the cause of it.

It’s calm outside the room, and Kageyama can’t help feel it’s mocking him when he’s everything but inside. He doesn’t even know where he’s wandering, his feet treading out of the hallway, his body feeling like Hinata’s still clinging to it and weighing him down.

“Kageyama?”

Later, Kageyama will reflect back on how embarrassing his reaction was: tensing up, jumping just a few millimeters off the floor, stumbling back and almost crashing into a wall.

Least it isn’t a door face first.

Daichi looks surprised and has one hand out, as if having been ready to catch Kageyama should he be a complete failure and fall. Which Kageyama wouldn’t have minded too much if it meant knocking him unconscious for a long time.

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” Daichi says, his voice a little hard that makes Kageyama thinks he’s toeing the line of getting in trouble.

Swallowing, Kageyama straightens and bows his head slightly. “S...Sorry. I didn’t see you there.” He also can’t help think of the ghost story Hinata had been worried about, and has a stupid concern about Hinata waking up and finding himself alone in the room.

That’s the second stupid thought of today.

“It’s alright. I wasn’t expecting you up already,” Daichi says, and now that Kageyama gets a better look at him, the captain looks fresh from being outside. There’s a faint breeze, and the distant sound of someone in the kitchen, probably their advisor. “What are you doing up?”

“You’re up.” Kageyama wants to kick himself in the face sometimes because words just fall out of his mouth and _think before you say stuff_.

Daichi chuckles though, so Kageyama thinks it didn’t come out as bad as he thought so. “Yes, well, a captain’s duty never ends. I was checking outside and then Takeda-san was getting up to help prepare breakfast. Shizumi usually makes it.”

Kageyama isn’t sure if he’s supposed to do something with that information, so he nods.

Daichi rakes his gaze over him quickly. Kageyama stays frozen in his spot during the analysis until the captain beckons. “Follow me.”

Kageyama does.

There’s a good distance from the kitchen and the back panel that brings you to the training ground. The chill picks up, biting Kageyama in the face as he steps outside and looks up at the trees too tall to see their tops, but thin enough that he can see bits of the dawn between their bodies.

Hinata would probably think it was a cool sight.

“It’s pretty cold,” Daichi says, waiting.

Kageyama answers by sitting on the same bench the captain takes, mindful to maintain a few feet between them as if Daichi may be able to smell their decoy on his person. In truth Kageyama’s not particularly fond of the cold one way or another. Still, it gives his body something else to focus on rather than the contrasting heat that is Hinata lingering on him.

“I take it you didn’t sleep much,” Daichi says.

Though it’s asked kindly, Kageyama reels back to the day he faced Daichi’s wrath and the look in his eye that had made him blurt out his feelings about (not) cooperating with Hinata. He feels a similar power now.

Kageyama looks at the nets, already set up for the day, and remembers the captain’s words from yesterday. Maybe the lack of sleep, his mental fatigue, and the morning’s cold all help to loosen his tongue where it had tangled before.

"No."

"I have a little time." Daichi leans forward, elbows on knees, hands clasped.

Patient.

Eventually, Kageyama takes in a quiet, deep breath. “How would you...handle a problem?” 

Daichi blinks at him, as if surprised Kageyama not only considered his offer but took it. “A problem. Well, it depends on the problem, don’t you think?”

It’s less than helpful, but Kageyama can only nod. He doesn’t think there’s any intelligence in him right now to try and make sense of his thoughts to form another question. He droops a little in his seat.

Then, after a pause, Daichi says, “But I’ve always been more of the type to address it head on.”

Kageyama lifts his head, looks at him. “Head on?”

“Mm. I suppose it depends, but often times, addressing things directly helps solve them. Otherwise, how do you ever really confront it?”

Logical point, and it further validates Kageyama’s desire to give his. Maybe his urge to do so isn’t so nonsensical after all.

“What if it involves other people?” Kageyama asks, sitting up straight again, leaning ever so slightly toward his captain.

“Oh? Ah, I see now.”

Kageyama really hopes Daichi does not, in fact, see at all.

The captain nods once, more to himself it seems. “But you’ve done it before yourself.”

“Huh?”

"You and Hinata,” Kageyama’s heart does a little dance at the name, “remember when I put you both out of the club until you worked out your dislike of each other. That was a problem, wouldn’t you say?”

Kageyama digests that. It’s true he tackled that problem straight on, reservations and all, and it had pushed them to become official members of the team. One problem solved but then simultaneously planting the seed for what is now his biggest and most nefarious problem yet. Isn’t he too young for irony?

“Yes,” he admits, breaking eye contact.

“And it involved Hinata. You didn’t know how it would work out, did you?”

Kageyama decides not to share the tidbit that he only assumed that because he was all Hinata needed to win against their senpais, or so he believed at the time. Annoying that that need has warped itself into what it is now.  _I want to make Hinata smile like that again._

“So,” Daichi continues, “addressing it is the first step. Worrying about the outcome will keep you wondering, and it can eat away at you from the inside.”

There’s a soft drop to Daichi’s voice. At least, Kageyama thinks so. Tempted, he studies the captain a little harder, and isn’t sure if the look in his gaze is one of melancholy, like revisiting some kind of memory. It almost sounds like Daichi knows what he’s talking about from experience. Not that Kageyama would know, so he drops the thought as easily as he can’t drop the ones about Hinata.

“Kageyama.”

“A-Ah. Yes?”

“I have to ask though--”

“It won’t be a problem for training,” Kageyama says, faster and with more desperation than he means to. “Or the team.”

Daichi watches him, then laughs softly. It confuses Kageyama into temporary silence. “You’re still very honest. I’m glad.” Daichi smiles. “Alright. I hope that means I was able to be of some help?”

“Yes.” Then, because Kageyama sometimes thinks, adds, “Thank you.” It’s genuine, and there’s a little more resolve in his intentions now.

Now is the matter of how. But right after training is over. By then, he should have sorted out the how’s.

And then, that’s when Kageyama will tell him.

One week.

He can survive a week.

**-x-**

Kageyama may not survive a week.

He would seriously be reconsidering the whole one-week plan if he isn't so sure he might die from being so tired one day into training. Could you keel over from exhaustion? He certainly didn’t die when he felt like rocks were piled over his heart and lungs when Hinata had snuggled up to him.

_Not helping. Stop thinking about that and breathe..._

He does, but Kageyama’s run so  ragged that he might take up on the shrimp’s habit of puking out his exhaustion. It’s disturbing to know he has to be running on no sleep and surviving their coach’s (who isn’t even _here_ but his training plans are) regimen to feel less burdened by his Hinata-affliction.

Definitely unhealthy.

After his talk with Daichi, Kageyama had dragged himself back to the room, and found the entirety of his blankets packed in Hinata’s arms. He actually felt an uncomfortable twinge in his chest to know his body was so easily replaced. That was stupid thought #3 of the day.

Upon his entrance, Hinata had burst out of sleep (totally oblivious to his cuddly antics), somehow already alert and pumped at once, and Kageyama ended up chasing after him because damn it, he wasn’t going to lose on dumb shit like a race to wash their faces. (Was a tie).

Then breakfast, a blur of food Kageyama forced down his gullet to compensate for the little sleep (made sense at the time, makes no sense now) and maybe because Tanaka made a comment about Hinata being able to out-eat Kageyama and, yeah, that feast frenzy happened.

Kageyama probably would have eaten into a coma had Daichi not scolded them both.

All of that feels like days ago.

“I can’t...feel...my legs.” That’d be Hinata, who has the compulsion to announce all things in relating to his bodily functions, or lack thereof at the moment.

Kageyama’s honestly too tired to care that Hinata can’t shut up even when he doesn’t have the breath to speak. Though not too tired not to spare a glance over at where Hinata’s sunken against a tree with roots so massive they can be used as seats. Kageyama has done just that, though falling face first into the dirt sounds just as appealing.

“Idiot,” Kageyama breathes. “That’s what happens when you run too fast.”

“Well it was a tie anyway.” Hinata huffs at him. He mumbles a whine and bumps his head back against the trunk. His face is perfectly flushed and Kageyama’s kind of hypnotized at how his chest rises and falls with each swallow of air. “Do you think the others will catch up soon?”

“I doubt it.”

“Well, I’ll win on the run back down.”

Kageyama’s seizes up at the new challenge and stops ogling his teammate. With care, he stands, feeling every burn in his muscles tenfold. Even his bones are feeling tired.

When Hinata does the same, he whines and slouches forward.

“Ow, ow,” Hinata hisses and rubs at his backside. Kageyama really wishes he wasn’t. “I’m going to really feel that tomorrow. Going uphill really hurts. And we already did all that practice before!  What if I can’t feel my legs at all tomorrow?”

Kageyama neglects to tell him he’s felt Hinata’s legs nudging against his own last night, and that they’ll be fine because Hinata is an anomaly with incredible stamina and recovery time.

“You're the one that was excited about it. This is small stuff to prepare for more demanding games.” And just in case Hinata really believes he’ll be leg-less, adds on, “The running will help. Plus we’ll cool down and be eating to make up for it.”

“Ahh, Kageyama knows a lot about that stuff, huh?” Hinata asks, and finally stops rubbing his cute little bottom.

_Okay. Did not just think that._

Kageyama’s neck starts to feel hot now that Hinata looks at him with something like admiration. “It’s common stuff for people like us. You’re just dumb for not knowing. Coach has said this stuff before.”

“What? I...I knew that!”

Kageyama’s starting to feel less exhausted and more pent up, especially the longer he stares down at Hinata’s pinched little lips in that way when he’s irritated. Kageyama snorts and turns away. Once, avoiding looking at Hinata felt like a needed interlude from all the damn annoyances and noise. Now, the world seems lackluster when Kageyama does it.

“Come on,” Kageyama says, stepping over a root. The trail Daichi mentioned snakes up and through the indigenousness of the mountain’s forest, carved out by use countless times before. With just them two, it’s easy to think they’re the only ones in the world using it.

Not the worst fantasy Kageyama’s had.

He instantly shuts down that one dream he had about Hinata before it can break what’s left of his psyche.

“Yeah, okay.” Hinata sighs and wobbles closer. “Or maybe…”

Kageyama looks over his shoulder. Hinata’s still a few yards off the trail, looking up past the tiny remnants of a shrine that marked their stopping point.

Already Kageyama understands, and as much as he wants to follow Hinata’s sight, he fixes on how vibrant the other boy is amongst the dreariness of the forest.

When Hinata flashes him a grin, he becomes that much more dazzling.

Kageyama doesn’t hesitate: he races right alongside him, ache in his legs be damned.

As the path steepens and it’s just the huff of their breath and crunch of dirt under their shoes, Kageyama kind of wishes it really is just them two here. For a while, he can pretend. That he can reach out and take Hinata’s hand (dangerous when you’re sprinting), and that Hinata would squeeze his back in return.

In the short time it takes them to reach the end, Kageyama finds out he doesn’t like pretending. Blood pulsing, he thinks he’ll reach the top, maybe find a bigger shrine erected to the tale of a deity and his love to another, or something his mom would call romantic like in those dramas she likes. There, he thinks he’ll forego the week-waiting thing and tackle it head on now, just look at Hinata as the shrimp admires the monument, all smiles and awe, and then, there, against the backdrop of feral terrain, he’ll say it.

_I like you._

They reach the mystery at the end of the trail, Kageyama’s heart bobbing up into his throat, hands clammy and he’s really going to do it.

There’s no shrine for anyone that greets his intentions there. No spectacular view from which proclamations of all embarrassing sorts have been shouted off of. Nothing, except an eyesore.

Their adventure winds down to a crummy little shack. 

It’s abandoned, swathed with tendrils of fog, and sagging to one side and the wood washed out to a dirty water kind of color. The path vanishes at the mouth of its entrance, door gone and replaced with the blackness of whatever survived years of neglect within it. Ugly. Decrepit. 

Somewhere, from another shrine dolled up with bells, offerings, and folded papers of prayers, a god is laughing at Kageyama.

“Whoa. Kageyama! Look at that!”

“I’m already looking at it.” Unfortunately. 

They’ve slowed to a walk and now stop altogether. Hinata starts to take a step further, not at all winded, then slides up behind Kageyama, peering around him. Kageyama feels the need to preen just a little, and suddenly doesn’t feel tired at all.

“...Do...Do you think it’s safe?” Hinata asks.

“It’s just some shack. Someone clearly lived here before,” Kageyama says.

“M-Maybe the girl--”

“Don’t start with that.”

“But what if it’s true!”

“Then we’ll just look inside and see it’s not. What, are you too scared?”

Hinata bristles and straightens like if he rises high enough on his tiptoes he can surpass Kageyama. At best, it just gives a better angle and view of his lips.

Kageyama whirls away from the sight and marches forward. “If you’re too scared--”

“H-Hey! I am not!” Hinata’s feet crunch the soil quickly as he matches Kageyama’s pace.

They loiter a few feet from the shack’s crooked mouth. Their breathing has quieted down some, making the silence, heavy with eeriness, feel like it’s alive. When Kageyama dares to creep closer, most certainly not afraid, he swears the air around them sighs.

_Nothing to be afraid of._

Kageyama’s not sure if he means to say those words to Hinata or keep them for himself for a whole different reason.

Hinata’s arm is pressed up against him by now, and when Kageyama makes to step on the porch, the shrimp grips onto the sleeve of his long shirt.

“Wait,” Hinata drops his voice to a whisper, “I heard something.”

“I didn’t.” Kageyama doesn’t know why he whispers back. He doesn’t shrug Hinata off as he steps up onto the porch. Its groan is deafening and has Hinata cling harder to his shirt. But he follows all the same, but Kageyama doesn’t think it’s to see who wins this contest anymore.

Up closer, Kageyama still can’t see much into the home. He creeps closer, breath trapped in his throat, body coiled tight even though he tells himself there’s nothing here. But there’s a bigger part of him warning him that there might be and Hinata is already vibrating against him.

With each step, the old place moans or creaks, but just as Kageyama’s ready to prove there’s nothing inside, Hinata inhales so sharply that Kageyama’s adrenaline spikes through him.

That time he heard it.

“What was that?” Hinata’s clinging onto his arm completely now, probably as unaware as he was doing it last night.

Something creaks that is not Kageyama’s footstep on the wood. A rustle of foliage somewhere behind the building. They both tense. Kageyama doesn’t even realize he’s clamped down over one of Hinata’s clenched hands.

It happens again and Hinata dives behind him, and Kageyama wants to scold him but the thing casts a big and tall enough shadow that has Hinata bail the hell out of there like it’s a demon after them and they've never run so fast.

Kageyama doesn’t have a functioning thought when Hinata yanks him along and now they’re both sprinting from--Kageyama dares a peek back--but there’s no demon hounding after their souls.

“Idiot! Wait! Look!”

He tugs Hinata to a stop, and the sudden jolt in their run makes him feel a little woozy. The deer-not-demon gallops past them. They scurry out of the way and watch as it vanishes into the thickness, leaving them not about to be devoured by the spirit of a vengeful girl.

It’s just the sounds of their breathing again for a while.

Hinata's laugh changes that.

He’s still out of breath, but Kageyama knows his laughter even if it’s rasped.

“Oh, man," Hinata gasps, "I really thought we were done for. Can you imagine?” laugh, wheeze, “At camp, of all places! You were really scared!”

“I was not! You’re the one who ran off first!”

Hinata glowers up at Kageyama, about to say something back, but then their eyes meet, and somehow that’s what alerts them that they haven't let go of each other.

Kageyama looks down.

They’re holding hands.

The grip is fierce, desperate from the earlier fear, just enough for him to feel the imprints of each digit.

He’s holding Hinata’s hand.

But this isn’t a fantasy. Kageyama’s eyes dart up and the pink in Hinata’s cheek looks redder than it had seconds ago from their exertion. Kageyama’s sure the adrenaline crashing through his veins is what keeps him from fainting about now.

_Holy shi--_

Kageyama rips his hand away. He instantly misses the feeling, but forces himself to turn his back to Hinata before he can see whatever face the shrimp may or may not make. He doesn’t dare looking over his shoulder either as he stomps off.

Because, yeah, that’s not suspicious.

Worse, he doesn’t know what to make when he hears Hinata follow him. Quietly.

They’ve gone off the trail at some point. Their flight took them into the uneven earth where the roots jut out, and it’s a miracle neither of them caught an ankle on one of them. They navigate their way through it all in a weird silence bred from an equally weird chain of events.

But damn that silence. How is it more grating that Hinata’s incessant jabbering? Kageyama feels the thud of a headache starting in his temples.

“What’s wrong with you?” Kageyama doesn’t mean to bark it out, but, too late. Like most things out of his mouth.

“Huh? What are you talking about?”

Kageyama spins on his heels. “Why are you being so damn quiet?”

“What? _You’re_ the one all mad all of a sudden.”

“I’m not mad.”

Hinata narrows his eyes at him then waves with his hands. “Your whole aura! It got really scary suddenly. I don’t know.” He tries to illustrate it with some sounds that resemble a recently castrated animal.

Kageyama feels his eye twitch.

He can’t believe he wanted to confess not minutes ago to this moron.

Hinata, at the least, stops making that foul noise. He’s gone silent again, staring up at Kageyama, and it feels like minutes of heartbeats when it’s not even two, that he breaks into a smile.

It quivers, and then, he breaks out laughing. Again. Only this time it doesn't stop.

Kageyama can only gawk as Hinata keeps laughing, winces and doubles over, the sound now pouring out of him like a tap that won’t turn off.

“What’s wrong with you _now_? This isn’t funny!”

“I...can’t help it,” Hinata sucks in a breath and whines as he makes himself straighten, rubbing a stitch in his side. “I just can’t believe it was a deer, just a deer! I mean we’re out here in the forest and didn’t think a deer would be around? A deer, Kageyama!”

He repeats the phrase through his paroxysm of laughing. Maybe it’s the remaining fear’s way of being expelled from his body. Somehow the sound doesn’t irritate Kageyama’s aching head.

In fact, he almost wants to smile because, now that he reflects on it, it all really was silly. Ridiculous, even. So ridiculous they ran faster than they ever had, holding hands all the while. From a deer.

Kageyama wonders if his mom would constitute this as the kind of ‘fun’ she hoped he would have.

Hinata sighs, his fit ebbing. He’s still smiling though. “You know, it was kind of fun.”

“Running like you thought that ghost was going to kill you?”

Hinata widens his grin. “Yeah.”

“Only you would find that fun.”

“My heart was beating so fast!” Hinata presses a hand to his chest, sighing heavily. “I don’t think it’s ever gone that fast before.”

Kageyama’s sure he can beat it, the way his own had when it recognized Hinata’s hand in his. But that’s one win he’ll keep to himself. Instead, he swallows hard and exhales hard.

“Well, thinking you’re about to die will do that.”

Is it weird how they’re talking now? Seconds ago Kageyama was yelling at Hinata over nothing in particular, and minutes before that they were darting hand-in-hand like the very deer they ran from.

Totally weird.

Hinata shrugs and steers his clearly sore legs through the wildlife. “I wonder if Daichi-san knew what was up here. We should tell them. You know, minus the whole deer trying to kill us thing.”

Kageyama doesn’t particularly care; he watches Hinata move ahead of him, the air between them no longer smothering. His eyes drop down to Hinata’s right hand and how the shrimp had been able to sweep him up in a heartbeat’s notice. Seems even off the court Hinata can do that.

Kageyama stops mid-step, upon realizing he wasn’t all at fault: Hinata had been the one to grab his hand and flee. Held it so tight Kageyama still feels its effects radiating up his entire arm.

He stands still, swallowing, waiting.

Hinata eventually turns around once he’s managed down the incline, eyebrows up. “Eh, Kageyama, aren’t you coming?” He tilts his head, frowning. “Your face looks weird.”

Kageyama takes in a deep breath, clenches his fists at his side, takes a step forward. “Hinata, I--”

Ankle catches a root.

Trips.

Falls.

Hinata cries out somewhere beneath the scream of his own blood and maybe he cries out too because pain rockets throughout his weary body, and his eyes flutter open though he doesn’t remember pinching them tightly shut. Nor does he remember landing on his back.

Hinata’s face is upside down. Not that it makes him look any less bright and Hinata-ful. But his eyes are wide and his mouth is moving fast, though Kageyama can’t really pick out what he’s saying.

“...okay?!”

Kageyama groans. The pain is more than happy to shock him back to the severity of the present. He tries to wave Hinata away because there's no way he landed down here from falling. The action of his wrist stings all the way up his arm, the same one that recently felt the good vibes from Hinata’s hand.

So much hurts.

Kageyama sits up, feeling and seeing the earth around him, on him, and the spot from which he’d slid from. Farther than he imagined and the way down isn't smooth. He blinks hard and presses a hand to his head like that will keep the world from tilting to one side.

“Kageyama!”

“Shut...up. I’m...I’m fine.”

"You're bleeding!"

That's the second time in less than a week's time Hinata has told him that. Kageyama draws his hand back, palm speckled with blood. The dirt's an addition from the last time though.

_Can't even get knocked unconscious right._

Kageyama tries to ignore Hinata flustered at his side, hands jerking around like they don't know what to hold onto. "I'm alright," Kageyama says. It comes out shuddered. "Head cuts always look worse than they are."

Hinata's up in his face, pressing fabric to his temple where the cut is. He's tugged his long sleeve over his hand and balled it into a fist to apply the pressure, and even at this angle it looks silly. Dizziness and a few other problems weaken the reality that Hinata's millimeters from his face, tending to him.

"Stop that," Kageyama says again, flinching away. "It's fine."

That is, until he means to make to stand.

He hates how he cries out, but he can’t stop the reaction no more than he can stop from seizing his right leg. He grips it hard like enough pressure will stop the awful feeling barbing up around around his limb.

“Kageyama, don’t! You’ll make it worse if you hurt it!” Hinata grabs his arm, shakes him a little since clearly that’s what any normal person would do when assisting the injured. “Don’t try to stand up like that, jeez! Let me see.”

“Don’t touch it! It’s fine!”

Hinata glares at him. “Don’t be a baby! You fell really badly like, I couldn’t even believe it.”  But he’s not laughing like the last time Kageyama got hurt. Instead, he smacks away Kageyama’s hands and mutters something only he understands while he flicks his gaze over Kageyama’s state.

“What hurts most?” he asks.

Pride, probably.

But Hinata’s looking at him with a kind of blank gaze that dares him to try and lie.

“My leg,” Kageyama blurts. “Might be the ankle.”

“Can you stand? No, nevermind.” Hinata shifts so he’s crouching. With more care than Kageyama thought him capable of, he struggles and succeeds in helping Kageyama to stand.

Kageyama hisses and Hinata loops one arm around his waist. “You have to put your weight on me. You can’t walk on that.”

“I’m no--”

“Just do it, will you?”

Kageyama winces as he does. Not completely, because he’s plenty sure Hinata can’t handle even half of his weight, but it’s enough to take the worst of the pressure from his ankle. It leaves him at an awkward lean into Hinata, arm around his shoulder, Hinata’s other hand holding his wrist.

“It’ll be fine. It just hurts a little,” Kageyama says. He sounds more breathless than he did running up the trail. More than the moment before he’d confessed. Then he didn't, and plummeted down a jagged, steep slope instead.

He almost wants to ask if the fall was real, and this isn’t just another nightmare. 

"You can say that after it's been looked at," Hinata says. He acts like it’s not going to be a challenge hauling a third of Kageyama back down the trail.

“Idiot,” Kageyama mutters. “It’s a long walk down to the meetup spot.”

“Then don’t trip again.”

“Don’t go thinking something’s going to kill us again,” Kageyama says back. The wooziness and headache really want him to throw up.

Hinata grunts and adjusts their position to accommodate what will be the long hobble down. It causes a few points of his hair to tickle Kageyama’s neck. With the other points of contact between them, Kageyama feels the pain’s claim on him dilute just a little. It makes the trip down seem less arduous. 

After all, Hinata’s somehow claiming more of him, every day, very fast. He just doesn’t know about it yet. At this rate, may never know it. 

But, even in his state, Kageyama believes there are worse reasons to have Hinata's arm around his waist.

Kageyama figures he'll think of one later.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy crap thank you again for the feedback. It really motivated me to finish this chapter even after being so pooped after work! Thank you so much. I can't gush enough about it ;o; You're all as awesome as Kageyama is a precious dork.
> 
> And yeah, I like to hurt the ones I love in fics, so I'm sorry (only a little) about Kageyama's suffering. He'll get his Hinata-happiness though.
> 
> Chapter's proverb in full is: even monkeys fall from trees.
> 
> Thank you so much for reading!


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